Rebuilding Your Life in Ten Easy Steps
by Ms. Selly
Summary: (FANTASY) Buffy got sent to boarding school to get her away from a controlling boyfriend. The dangerous British singer she meets there probably wasn't part of the plan.
1. Chapter 1

Rebuilding Your Life in Ten Easy Steps

Prologue

Disclaimer: Not mine.

            **Dear Mother and Father,**

**Don't get any ideas…this doesn't mean I have forgiven, forgotten, or in any way gotten less mad.  I still hate you for ruining my life and betraying me.  But I bet Caesar would have still sent that Brita guy a holiday card. If he had been not so much with dead and…never mind.  Happy Holidays guys.**

**Unhappily,**

**Buffy**

**PS: I expect extra big X-mas presents this year if you ever want to be forgiven.**

Buffy read over the letter once and, satisfied, tucked into the first envelope: Hank and Joyce Summers.  Then she pulled out another piece of her light floral stationary.

            **Dear Dawnie,**

**How are you?  I'm not good at all, but I hope you are.  I hope you're treating Mom and Dad with the right grumpy-ness.  I wish so much I could be there with you for X-mas.  I'll be sending you your present soon. Don't peek! ****J Hopefully I'll be home soon…keep working the 'rents!**

**Kisses and Hugs,**

**Buffy xoxox**

            Inserting it into the "Dawn Summers" envelope, Buffy sighed.  This was harsh.  Sending your own immediate family Christmas cards.  How could her parents do this to her?  She still remembered the very day they ruined her life.  She was driving home from the movies.  She and Riley Finn, her wonderful boyfriend, were triple dating with her two best friends, Cordelia Chase and Harmony Kendall, with their boyfriends, Mitch Jones and Hamilton Hart, respectively.

She had just been thinking about why her friends understood what her parents couldn't.  Some things just came first, before family functions, or friends.  Boyfriends were one of those things.  But her parents were all freaky, going on about how Riley was "controlling" and all sorts of stupid stuff.  She pulled into her driveway and thought about how happy she was to live in LA.  When she got inside her parents were sitting on the couch in the living room looking solemn.  She asked what was up and they told her this was as hard for them as it was for her.

Then the bomb dropped.  They were sending her away.  She had to go to boarding school.  She would leave everything and everybody she knew.  And the joke? They were doing it because they loved her.  Ha! If they loved her, they would understand that she could make her own decisions and she knew what she was doing! They wouldn't destroy her life.  She left early the next morning.

That was how Buffy Anne Summers had gone from queen of Hemery High in Los Angeles to no-name girl at Salus High School, Wisconsin. Wisconsin! Did they know what was in Wisconsin? Cows and German people!  That was it!  No, her parents didn't love her.  Not to send her here.  She would have no friends at all if she hadn't been flunking geometry.  If she hadn't been assigned Willow Rosenberg (Class A Farm Fresh Geek) as a tutor.  Her only friend.  Shy, nerdy and naïve maybe…but still her friend.

And she could only send mail to her family.  Couldn't even write Cordy or Harmony or Riley and tell them where she was.  They must think she was such a total loser, ditching them like that.  Actually, they had probably forgotten her already.  "Buffy who?" they would say if someone managed to smuggle a letter to them.  Then they would laugh.  She would never get to laugh with them again.  Buffy began to rethink sending her parents a Christmas card.

Please tell me what you think!


	2. Chapter 2

Rebuilding Your Life in Ten Easy Steps

Part 1

Disclaimer: I don't own any of it.  Though I would like to have Spike as my pet. And the song is the theme song to Serial Experiments Lain and is performed by BOA (I think).

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            Buffy sat at the desk in her room and carefully titled her piece of loose leaf paper: The Affects of Immigration on a Country.  She admired her handiwork, and stretched.  Too bad she didn't actually know anything about immigration stuff.

            "E," Willow said absentmindedly from behind a rather large book she was reading.  Luckily, the head of the school had been persuaded to let Willow trade with Buffy's previous roommate Kathy.  She had seriously been a nightmare.

            "Hmm?" Buffy asked, looking quizzically at Willow.

            "It's 'effects'. With an 'e'."

            "How do you know that-"

            "You always mix up 'affect' and 'effect'," Willow smiled shyly at her sort-of friend before going back to her book.

            "Will, I've had enough of this," Buffy slammed her book shut causing her roommate to jump, "We are going out.  We're going to have fun."

            "Fun?"

            "Yeah, it's something we humans have sometimes."

            "I know what fun is," Willow said with a blush, "I…I just wondered what you wanted to do.  For, you know, fun."

            "Come on Willow, we both know you're a dirty little eavesdropper.  So, what have you heard?  What hot thing is happening?"  
            "I do not eavesdrop!" Willow was scandalized, "I just…listen."  Buffy arched her eyebrows doubtfully. "I don't.  Not…really." She smiled guiltily and Buffy laughed. "Well, I did hear about a new band that's playing at a club in town…they're supposedly really good."

            "To the club it is!" Buffy proclaimed, leaping to find a suitable outfit.

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            The club was quite loud and fairly smoky.  It was basically a bar, except for the stage and dance floor.  Instruments were on stage, but no people.  Willow grabbed an electric blue flyer off the floor.

            "'The Sunnyhell Players is an eclectic band with songs varying from modern day punk rock, old school rock, and even some big band era hits.  Featuring: William Marsters (vocals), Lorne Caritas (keyboard/back-up vocals), Charles Gunn (guitar)'" Willow read, "Sounds…interesting."

            "I think it sounds pretty cool.  Ooh…I think they're coming!"  The lights swirled and dimmed and the band stepped onto stage.  In the dark, Buffy could only see their silhouettes.  Then the piano struck up an eerie, melancholy beat.

            "And you don't seem to understand…" a low and seductive voice began, "A shame, you seemed an honest man."

The lights came back a little, and Buffy found herself gaping.  William Marsters was quite possibly the most beautiful thing she had ever seen.  His hair was white-blonde, and curled playfully around his ears.  He was pale, and clad entirely in black, except for a few silver chains and earrings.  His eyes were a stormy sort of blue…piercing and knowing.  And his voice…she thought she might melt.  As Cordelia would say if she were here: Hello salty goodness!

            "And all the fears you hold so dear," he stroked the microphone stand gently, "Will turn to whisper in your ear.  And you know what they say might hurt you, and you know that it means so much…and you don't even feel a thing…"

            The guitar started in, played by a muscular African-American man with a shaved head, and many couples started to sway on the floor.  Buffy ignored the several guys who were trying to catch her eye.  She was captivated by the song.

            "I am falling, I am fading, I have lost it all…" the piano player, a scrawny man with wildly orange hair and green lipstick joined in, but all Buffy heard was William.  He looked like he meant it…he really did.

            "And you don't seem the lying kind…a shame that I can read your mind," he drew his lips back into a slight sneer before continuing on, "And all the things that I read there, that candle-lit smile that we both share…and you know I don't mean to hurt you, and you know that it means so much…but you don't even feel a thing..."

            A large number of girls without a partner on their arm, and a large number with a now very disgruntled looking partner, stared open mouthed at him.

            "I am falling, I am fading, I am drowning…help me to breathe," his voice soared powerfully and she felt it.  The rage, sorrow and fear he felt, "I am losing, I have lost it all, I am drowning.  Help me to breathe…" The song drifted to a quiet stop and he dipped his head to mad applause.  When he looked up again he was grinning wolfishly.

            "Thank you ladies!" He blew a kiss.  _Ooh…British…_Buffy licked her own lips and let her face sink into her hands with a sigh.  Even Willow was mouthing speechlessly at him.  The band struck up another song and they played several more.  Buffy rarely, if ever, blinked.  When the band took a break, she allowed herself a deep breath before looking up at the stage.  William Marsters was eyeing her with a telling smirk.  He jumped off the stage and swaggered over, looking very cat-like and predatory.

            "Mind if I join you lovely vixens for a drink?"

            "Please." Buffy said, keeping her voice calm and collected while the rest of her was overheating.  _Ohmigod ohmigod ohmigod!_  He pulled out the last chair at their table, flipped it around and straddled it, leaning his elbows on the table.

            "Hey!" He signaled to a bartender who walked over.  There wasn't really waitstaff at the club, but as a member of the band, Buffy supposed he got special privileges, "I'll take a beer, and the ladies will have margaritas."  The bartender nodded and headed back to mix the drinks.  Buffy was a little worried.  She had never really been drinking before…

            "What?" The singer sitting across from her noticed her discomfort.

            "Nothing," she said, sitting up straighter, "I just don't like it when men assume they know what I want."

            "Now, now, pet.  I think we both know what you want…" he licked his lips and his eyes made perfectly clear he what he was talking about.  The bartender set the drinks on the table and headed back to his usual duties.  William took a long swallow, still watching Buffy and Willow closely.  Buffy shot him her sexiest smile and took a sip.  She blanched a bit and swallowed hard.  Her male tablemate crowed in triumph.

            "I knew it!  Only schoolgirls, aren't you?  So, where d'you go?"

            "Salus." Willow blurted out.

            "The boarding school?" He raised his eyebrows, "And how is that working out for you?  Life of virtue and all."

            "It's a boarding school, not a convent," Buffy said, rolling her eyes.  He laughed.  She loved his laugh.  It was pure, not tainted with any ulterior motives or worry about other's thoughts.

            "Hey dumpling," the pianist with the green makeup had come to lean on William's shoulders, "We're back on in a few."  He glanced up at Buffy and Willow, "Care to introduce me to your lady friends?"  He smiled at them, very friendly and warm, not at all like his bandmate's half-leer.  Not that Buffy minded if that delicious guy wanted to leer at her.

            "Well, if they decide to introduce themselves to me, I'd be happy to."

            "Oh!  I'm Buffy.  Buffy Summers."

            "Willow Rosenberg," Willow managed to squeak.  She was thoroughly awed with both of them.

            "I'm Lorne, and this cute little fella is William or Spike, whichever floats your boat."  William elbowed him with a disgruntled scowl.

            "Spike'?  I like it," Buffy said with a laugh.  William grunted, which only made her laugh more.  When he turned to talk to Lorne, she dug quickly in her purse for a pen.  She had to give him her number.  Finally, she found one and looked up triumphantly.  The boys were gone, and the band had started up again.

            "Oh…" Buffy said, with a sigh of disappointment.

            "Buffy," Willow whispered and pointed.  Buffy looked and her face broke into a huge smile.  Scrawled across the corner of her napkin was a phone number and two words: Call me.

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Once again, tell me your thoughts.  Improvements, stuff you liked, how my characterization is.  I crave feedback!


	3. Chapter 3

Rebuilding Your Life in Ten Easy Steps

Part 3

A/N: I just realized it's really confusing if Buffy calls both Willow and William/Spike "Will".  So, here's what's happening: If "Will" is part of a narration or spoken by Lorne or Gunn, it means Spike and if it's spoken by Buffy it means Willow. Buffy will be calling Spike Spike from now on. "Willow" will always be typed out in narration. FYI

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            Buffy was feeling depressed.  Sure, things were going wonderfully between her and Will.  She never mentioned the conversation she had with Lorne, and though sometimes she felt uncomfortable knowing more about him than he knew she did, she was giving him his chance and he was doing a great job.  It was entirely possible that she was in love with him.  While any other time this would have made her ecstatic, Christmas was fast approaching.  Willow was heading back to her hometown, and Buffy had no where to go and no one to hang out with over the break.  The phone rang and she leaned over, feeling very tired.

            "Mmm?"

            "Hello, Buffy?"  
            "Spike, hi.  What's up?"  
            "Well, I was…that is, I wondered…well…oh bugger it all.  I don't know what I'm doing.  Buffy, would you like to spend Christmas with my family?"  Buffy sat up quickly.

            "Christmas? With your family?"

            "Yeah, well, I didn't think you'd want to but I figured I might as well-"

            "I'd love to!  Thank you so much!  How long? When? What do I wear?"  Will seemed completely overwhelmed.

            "Eh…well…I don't…not sure…here, I'll give you a number."  He rattled off a phone number and once Buffy had it down, he said "love you" and hung up rather abruptly.  Buffy shook her head. He was hopeless. But Christmas! He had invited her to Christmas, with his family no less!  She grabbed the phone and dialed.

            "Hello, Giles residence," a friendly female voice said.  Buffy suddenly realized she had no clue who to talk to or if anyone here knew who she was.

            "Oh, um, hi.  I'm Buffy, and-"

            "Oh, Buffy Summers?  It's so nice to finally hear you! I'm Jenny, Will's step-mom.  I've been waiting for a chance to talk to you!  Why are you calling, dear?"

            "Oh, well, William invited me to Christmas and-"

            "Did he? About time he brought a girlfriend home.  He had no clue when, or what you should bring, did he?"  Buffy laughed.  This Jenny sounded like someone she could like.  Plus the added excitement of hearing she was the first girl Will had ever brought home.  Her day was just improving by the second.

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            **Dear Buffy,**

**Thank you so much for your note.  Even if you haven't forgiven us, it means a lot that you would send us holiday greetings.  Merry Christmas to you too, dear.  I picked out this present for you, and your dad paid for, so it's from both of us.  We hope it's enough of an 'extra big' present for you, and that you feel better about Salus soon.  Oh, and I wanted to tell you I give you official parental permission to open your present right now, since I know that's what you're going to do anyway.  We are, however, keeping the present you sent for Dawn under lock and key.  Rest assured she will not open it till Christmas Day.  I love you very much Buffy, and I hope we'll be visiting you soon.**

**Much love,**

**Mom**

Buffy smiled slightly at the letter despite herself.  She then turned her attentions to the package that had accompanied it.  She had official permission to open it.  Tearing at the paper, she gasped a little when she saw what was inside.  A dress…but so much more than a dress.  The perfect dress.  The perfect dress for Christmas with Will's family.

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            William stared through the windshield of his car, driving Buffy back to his father's house.  No matter how many times he went, he never liked returning to his father's grasp.

            "Buffy, if," Buffy turned to looked at him and saw he was struggling for words, "If, my father says anything…rude to you, please, it's, well, it's not about you.  Just, don't take it personally."  Buffy nodded slightly and he relaxed.  That was better.  At least he got that out of the way.  He didn't want Buffy thinking his father didn't like her, just because he thought every girl Will brought home was a dirty whore.  He didn't want Buffy to feel bad because of his bad choices.

            "So, who's all going to be here?"

            "Oh, some of my extended family comes some years, some years is just me, Dad, Jenny and Wes.  My half-brother.  So, I don't really know, but I'd guess a couple cousins will be showing up."  The silence settled again.  Neither of them were really sure what to say to each other, so they said nothing.  Snow fell gently onto the car as they drove along the highway.

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Really short chapter, but I'll try to make the next one extra long. Promise.


	4. Chapter 4

Rebuilding Your Life in Ten Easy Steps

Part 4

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            Buffy stood in the cold and shivered.  Will had gone in to talk to his family before bringing her in, and despite her fuzzy coat, she was freezing.  She missed southern Californian weather, she really did.  There were footsteps behind her and she turned to see Will clomping back out through the small.

            "What's up?" She asked, shaking slightly.

            "You look freezing," he said in quiet concern and she was soon wrapped in both his coat and his arms and feeling much warmer, "Well, two of my cousins should be here any minute, so we'll be waiting for them.  That all right with you, pet?"

            "Oh, sure.  I'm all toasty now. Tell me about them."

            "Well…that reminds me.  I don't want you to be offended by Liam, he's-"

            "A selfish bastard with no respect for a woman's mind or morals?  A self-righteous son a of bitch who should be put down like the filthy dog he is?" An Irish accented voice suggested from somewhere to her left.  Turning, she saw a laughing young man with a darkly handsome face and slightly spiked hair.

            "Liam!" Will laughed and shook his head, breaking away from Buffy to embrace his cousin.

            "It's been a long time, Will."

            "Did you bring Darla?" Will asked.

            "But of course, but of course, she's around here somewhere," Liam waved his hand vaguely behind him towards the car he had apparently arrived in.  Then he turned his attentions to Buffy, "And who might this morsel be?"

            "Buffy Summers. And hands off, she's mine."

            "You imply I would put my hands on," Liam said pretending to be shocked, "You cut me to the quick!"  He then turned and his eyes quickly flickered up and down Buffy's frame, "I take it back, you have every right to imply. Definitely a hands-on exhibit."  Buffy blushed and Liam, his goal accomplished, grinned roguishly at her.

            "I honestly don't know why Darla puts up with you," Will said, shaking his head.

            "Sometimes I don't either," a pretty blonde who had just walked over agreed.  She grabbed the hood of Liam's jacket and yanked it hard.  He fell backwards into the snow and she put a high-heeled foot on his chest.

            "Darla! My love, my lady, my abuser!" Liam cried dramatically from his rather compromised position.  Darla pretended to ground the point of her heel into him and smiled at Buffy.

            "I don't think I know you."

            "That, my precious flower, is Buffy. The Buffy. The wonderful and exalted Lady Buffy, paramour of the cruel and uncaring man who calls himself my cousin and yet allows me to lie here in the snow, getting frostbitten."  Darla shook her head and leaned forward to gently kiss Buffy's cheek.

            "It's nice to meet you, and please ignore anything my loud and obnoxious Liam, Lord of Uncalled for Dramatics, says."

            "Ah, a crippling wound! A stake through my heart!  I think I shall shrivel up and die, denied even a crumb of affection from the woman of my dreams, the wonderful and terrible Darla, Queen of Ice," Liam shuddered and died, tongue lolling out and collecting snowflakes.  Buffy was overcome by giggles.

            "What are you doing now?" A quiet voice that sounded extremely familiar asked.  Buffy looked up and did a double take.  It wasn't possible…

            "Hail!  Might you aid me kind sir?" Liam asked, coming back to life rather quickly and holding his hand up.

            "Hello Angel," Will said, shaking the newcomer's hand warmly.  Buffy was still blinking with confusion.  There were two of them?  
            "This is Buffy," Will continued, "Buffy, this is Angel, Liam's brother."  Buffy shook Angel's cool hand.

            "Pleasure," Angel said solemnly before continuing forward to go inside.

            "Ignore him!" Liam was talking again, "He is tortured and brooding and absolutely no fun at all!  Pay no attention to him…his twin is in dire peril in case you have forgotten."

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            Buffy walked nervously into the cavernous dining room.  Meeting the parents.  This was the stuff nightmares were made of.  As if sensing her discomfort, William slipped his arm around her waist.  She leaned closer to him gratefully.  She needed all the extra support she could get.  At the end of the fairly long table sat a man and a woman.  The man was older, with glasses.  Will's father.  The woman looked much fresher, if not younger, with dark hair and a smile.  Jenny.

            "Hello, Buffy.  It's so nice to finally meet you face to face," Jenny smiled at her and Buffy settled down a tiny bit.  At least someone was happy to meet her.

            "It's nice to meet both of you," she replied with a smile.

            "I'm sorry to say I haven't heard very much about you," Mr. Giles said, with a mild challenge in his eyes.

            "Well, she's here now," Will cut in abruptly.  He ushered Buffy to a seat while Liam, Angel, and Darla were greeted.

            "What's up with you?" Buffy hissed at him.  He looked away, at his hands, at the ceiling and cleared his throat slightly.

            "I, well, I haven't told them that…they don't know you're still in high school, pet."

            "So?  Why would that be a problem?"

            "Think about it, luv," he said tensely, "Would your family be jumping for joy if they found out you were dating someone five years older than you?"

            "Oh."  She understood now.  When he put it that way, it did sound very…cradle-robbing-ish.  She didn't usually think about that.  But yeah…Will was 21.  And she was 16.  That could seem pretty bad to an outside eye.

            "So, Buffy, how did you and William meet?"  Mr. Giles was talking again.

            "Well, a friend and I went to one of his band's shows and we got to talking when he was taking a break."

            "So you're still playing that…music?"

            "Yeah.  I am."  His father's barely contained distaste was matched by Will's defiance.  They glared at each other until an opening door distracted everyone.  
            "Hello all!  We're here!"  A young man with glasses and dark hair was escorting a shyly smiling brunette who was very slightly built.

            "Wesley," Mr. Giles smiled brightly, "And this must be Winifred."

            "Fred, please." Fred said with a nervous grin.

            "Oh, I don't believe I know you," the beaming Wesley turned to Buffy.

            "This is Buffy Summers, my girlfriend.  Buffy, this is my half-brother Wesley."  Buffy shook the offered hand with a careful smile.  Wesley headed down to be embraced by his father and Fred slipped into the chair next to Buffy.  Darla gave a quick kiss to Liam and headed over to sit on Fred's other side.

            "We girlfriends need to stick together," she whispered conspiratorially to them.  Fred laughed quietly and Buffy smiled.  She liked Darla.

            "So, Liam.  How is the acting going?" Wesley, who had settled on Mr. Giles's right turned to his cousin.

            "Oh, lovely, just lovely.  I played in 'Bye Bye Birdie' earlier this year, and I'm a shoo-in for Hamlet in spring.  Of course, Father still disapproves as strongly as ever.  I've been having an absolutely corking time."  Everyone rolled their eyes at Liam's enthusiasm and Wesley turned his attention to the twin.

            "What about you, Angel?"

            "Oh, he's still the masked crusader, protecting the streets from those vicious brigands who would no sooner look at a gum wrapper than drop it," Liam cut in, not giving his brother the benefit of any air time.  Wesley laughed gently.

            "And how is the band doing, William?" He asked diplomatically.

            "It's just peachy keen," Will said with a very wide, very fake grin.

            "Tell us how you are, Wesley.  What have you been doing?  Where did you meet this lovely young flower?" Mr. Giles smiled fondly at Fred who blushed.  Wesley drew himself up a bit and cleared his throat.  He never got the chance to begin.

            "Oh yes," Will drawled, tilting his chair back on it's back legs, "Regale us Wesley, with tales of your fascinating life."

            "William," his father's eyes flashed, "I thought we had been over this."

            "Right, right.  What's the rule again, pops?  Sit down and shut up and listen to ickle Wesley's drivel with a smile?"

            "Now see here, I will not have you-"

            "Have me what? Hmm?  Ruining your lovely little gathering?  Interrupting your perfect little life?  Well, guess what," He slammed down the knife he had been playing with and rose from his chair, "I'm not going to just be shunted to side so I can listen to the brat prattle on about his "life adventures" and the wonderful times he's had with his horsy little bitch."  With that, he spun around and stormed out of the room.  Fred looked close to tears, Mr. Giles was very red-faced, and Wesley was thunder-struck.  Liam, for once, did not comment and his brother was, as always, silent.

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            "Go away." Buffy scowled at the door and knocked harder, "Shove off!"

            "You don't let me in and I'm going back to Salus right now!"  There was a grunt of disgust from inside, footfalls, and the door opened.  She marched in, not giving him another chance to tell her to leave.

            "What?" He asked defiantly, raising his eyebrows high, daring her to ask him more.

            "How about you start about what happened down stairs?"

            "You were there, pet.  You saw what happened."

            "Yeah, I did, and I don't like what I saw.  I don't know where the friendly, caring man I agreed to spend Christmas with went, and when his cruel, heartless evil twin moved in."  William opened his mouth to respond then looked away.

            "About the time he saw his father, I'd wager."

            "What's going, Spike?  You can tell me.  Just talk to me."

            "Wesley is on his second year of 'sabbatical' after high school.  He has no means of supporting himself, he still lives here, and to top it off he's a pansy.  And he's still the favorite.  He's still the son my father always wanted.  Because I could throw away everything that makes me Spike.  I could let my hair grow out, quit the band, marry a prim and proper British rose, become William Giles, English Literature professor at Oxford…and the man would still treat me like I'm the outsider in the family.  I was sitting there, and it made me sick.  Miss Winifred, scrawny little southern chit, immediately beloved cuz she's here with the great Wesley.  She's stuck right up there with blood relations, because Wesley likes her. While you're treated like some filthy trull that just wandered in off the street.  And if the places were reversed, it would be you, Buffy.  If I was dating the twig, and Wesley was dating you, you would be the one treated like a princess.  And she would be the one feeling like she was too dirty to sit at Rupert Giles's table.  I couldn't stand it, Buffy.  I just couldn't."

            "Know what Spike?  You aren't mad at Fred.  I don't think you're even mad at Wesley.  Because you know it isn't his fault that his father was your father first.  It isn't his fault that you aren't treated as well as you should be.  You're mad at your father."

            "Thanks for the newsflash Ms. Freud," Will said with a wry smile, "Now what do you prescribe?"

            "First, you," Buffy seized his arm, "and I, are going to go apologize to Fred for how extremely rude you were to her."  He groaned and she tightened her grip.  He was going to apologize whether he liked it or not.

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            "I was angry about other things, and I took it out on you.  I have issues," William screwed up his nose, trying to recall Buffy's anti-pep talk in the hall on the way, "I am a…bad, rude, nasty man and can you ever forgive me?"  Fred blushed profusely at the kneeling and penitent form of her boyfriend's brother and nodded quickly.  This was embarrassing.  He got up quickly and dusted off his knees, "Glad that's over."

            "Spike!" Buffy cried with a horrified jab to his ribs.  He rubbed his side with a hurt look.

            "Ow…"

            "Serves you right!  You don't say something like that after an apology!"

            "It's fine, really," Fred laid a hesitant hand on Buffy's shoulder, "I don't mind."

            "You need to stand up for yourself, Fred!  Guys like Spike need someone to put them in their place."

            "And where would that place be exactly?" Spike asked, with an almost perfectly straight face, goading her into saying something she would regret.

            "Beneath me of course," Buffy said, not yet grasping the cause for his amusement.

            "Buffy…you know it's quite rude to talk about that in front of other people," he said with the sexy smirk he always saved for her.  Buffy looked at him in confusion for a few moments before clapping a hand over her mouth in sudden comprehension.

            "Spike!!"

            "Are you going to punish me now?" He asked hopefully, pressing his tongue against the back of his teeth and tilting his head lazily.  With a squeal of apology to Fred, she escorted her boyfriend rather firmly out of the room.

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Told you this one would be longer.  I always keep my promises.  Remember that. RR


	5. Chapter 5

Rebuilding Your Life in 10 Easy Steps

Part 5

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            Buffy stared hopelessly at her reflection in one of the many cheerfully decorated store windows.  'Silver Bells' played in the background and more people than she thought lived in all of Wisconsin were crushing past her.  And she had no idea what to buy for anyone.

            Considering he was related to them, William had extremely limited knowledge of his family.  How was she, the girlfriend, supposed to know what to buy if an actual blood relative didn't?  All he managed to cough up were tidbits, most of which she already knew.  Liam loved to act.  Angel wanted to be a private investigator, and was quiet.  Mr. Giles was a retired librarian.  Jenny was into the occult.  Darla was an aspiring model.  Wesley was a prick.  _That's great.  I'll just head over to 'Pricks R Us ' and pick something up._  Fred was from Texas.  How perceptive of him.

            And up against the monumental task of buying for William's family came the impossible task of buying for William himself.  This time it wasn't a matter of not knowing what he would like.  There were dozens of possible gift ideas for him.  The problem was deciding which.  Was it too early to get him something romantic?  How expensive should it be?  Was he this agonized over her gift?  It was the first gift giving holiday they would be spending together and she didn't know the protocol.  Riley had never wanted to exchange gifts.  That had seemed cold in LA, now it seemed very practical.

            "Damn it all," she growled under her breath as a wind-up monkey waved happily from inside the store.  Turning away, finally deciding there was probably no chance of the answers to her questions divinely appearing in a toy store window, she continued to stroll through the mall.

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            "No, no, that's not right," William growled in frustration and massaged his temples as the very tense clerk bustled away.  He was going through hell to find Buffy the perfect present.  He'd never bought a present for a female non-relative before.  Everything that came to mind, jewelry, candy, flowers, clothing, all seemed too…mainstream.  He wanted something different.  Something that would show Buffy how special she was.

            Surveying the mall through the glass front of the shop, he gloomily took in the different offerings.  His eyes fell on one smallish store front and he grinned suddenly.  Perfect.

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            "Presents, presents, shall I compare thee to a summer's day?  Thou art far more enjoyable and thou add so much more to the pile of junk in my closet…"  Fred giggled appreciatively at Liam's ode to his gifts.  Darla just rolled her eyes.

            "You know you can't open them till midnight," Angel commented from an armchair near the television.  He was more relaxed then Buffy had ever seen him, watching a Christmas Eve marathon.  She even thought she heard him humming along with the current musical number, which appeared to be about an elf who liked dentistry.

            "Stupid family traditions," Liam sighed, replacing a brightly wrapped package to it's place under the tree.  Everyone laughed this time, Buffy included.  William had told her how his family always opened gifts at midnight on Christmas Eve with some embarrassment.  But he didn't have to worry.  She thought it was sweet, all the fun little quirks his family had.  As her laughter died, she yawned widely.  There were still several hours until midnight, but she was tired.

            "C'mere Buffy," William said from the couch he was sprawled out on.  She rose from the floor and walked over, eyes feeling a bit fuzzy from drowsiness, "You look exhausted…"  She nodded slowly and wobbled a bit.  She closed her eyes and suddenly felt herself being guided downwards.  She opened them and discovered William had pulled her into his lap.  Hands on her shoulders, he leaned her up against his chest and rubbed her arms soothingly.  Smiling she closed her eyes gratefully.  This was something she could get used to.  Riley didn't like to touch.  It was pretty much either making out in someone's room or strictly no contact.  But William had showed her how much she liked to cuddle.  Cuddling was fun…

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            "Is she asleep?"  
            "I think so…"

            "Well, it's not like she's in an uncomfortable place."

            "Can we open presents without her?"  
            "No!"

            "Then let's wake her up."  
            "We can't just wake her up!"

            "Why not? Hey Buffy, wake up!"

            Buffy blinked blearily and sat up slowly.  Where? What?  Her eyes cleared and she saw that Darla and Fred were both scolding Liam and Angel was sitting on the floor peering up at her.

            "It's midnight," he said simply.  It took her brain a while to work that out.

            "Oh, presents," she said and yawned.  She felt much better rested.  She turned kissed William lightly, "Sorry…I didn't mean to actually fall asleep."

            "No problem," he grunted, helping her to stand.

            The seven of them gathered around the tree and Liam started to pass out presents.

            "Aren't your parents coming?" Buffy asked.

            "No, they're at a party," Wesley replied, which didn't really surprise Buffy.  After all, Jenny and Giles were only, technically, Wesley's parents.  Besides, they seemed to allow all the younger members of the Giles clan to their own devices.

            "Open presents! Open presents!" Liam began to chant, sounding very much like a small child.  Once everyone had stopped their conversations and were looking at him, he dramatically selected a package from the mound in front of him, "This one is from Buffy!"  He ripped viciously through the paper to find a star-shaped mirror that was inscribed with 'The Face of a Star' all along the edges.  After much oohing and aahing, Buffy selected her gift from Liam, in accordance with Giles' tradition.

            It was a rather lacy, fairly skimpy lingerie set.  Buffy blushed deeper than she thought she ever had in her entire life and Liam cackled brightly from across the room.  Obviously this was his intended reaction.  She managed to choke out a thank you before stuffing 'It' behind her quickly.  Darla decided to open Buffy's gift as well and was very pleased to find a certificate for a free head-shot at a very popular photography studio.

            Darla's present to Buffy was an extremely extensive manicure kit.  She liked this present much more than the previous one.  And so it continued.  From Wesley, Buffy received a home spa kit.  Fred had invented something for her that looked like it was either a rotating make-up display…or a toaster.  Whichever, Buffy was flattered that Fred had invented something just for her.  Fred and Wesley got matching eyeglass cases from her, and they seemed thrilled.  From Angel was personalized stationary, to Angel, 'Where Cops Don't Go: Heroes in Private Investigation'.  He loved it.  But now it was the moment of truth.  Time for Buffy and Spike to exchange gifts.

            He presented his to her first.  She gingerly took the box from him and slowly unwrapped it.  Lifting the cover off the box, she couldn't help but gasp.  It was a piece of stained glass…but special.  The large dark scarlet rose attached to the hanger, and swaying beneath the rose was sort of a banner that read, in medieval looking script: 'Buffy'.

            "Oh, Spike, it's gorgeous," she whispered and, carefully setting her gift down, kissed his cheek.  He grinned widely, relieved she liked it.  He had been so worried she would think it was weird.  Now, Buffy shyly handed him her gift.  He opened it unbelievably slowly and she wrung her hands with anxiety.  What if he didn't like it?  It had seemed like a good idea when she thought of it…but now…now she wasn't so sure.

            But it was too late for not sures, he was lifting it out of the box.  A black leather collar with silver studs along it.  Smiling, he noticed the dog tags that hung from the center.  The first one he read aloud.

            "Spike," he let that one fall and grabbed the next one and began to laugh, "Property of Buffy Summers!"  Buffy stared at him.  Was this a bad sign? Laughing?  Before she could puzzle anymore she was swept into a tight hug, with light kisses rained down on her hair.   _Oh…good sign._

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That's all for now! Terribly sorry it took so long to update, but I was really busy for the past couple weeks.  I'll try harder now.


	6. Chapter 6

Rebuilding Your Life in 10 Easy Steps

Part 6

A/N: I am very very very extremely sorry about the ungodly slow updates! I try, I really do…but as my '7 Habits of Highly Effective Teenagers' states: 'I try' is a pathetic excuse. -sigh-

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Buffy stood at the top of the stairs, trying to calm down. Christmas dinner. It had seemed like such a nice friendly thing a few hours ago. But now she would rather face exams in classes she didn't have than eat dinner. _At least my dress is perfect_…she thought glumly, looking down to survey herself. When she opened the box her mother had sent, she had been so thrilled about wearing this dress. Dusty red velvet, snowflake sparkles along the hem, slit on the side that went just high enough to be flirty without being overly sexy. The perfect dress.

"Buffy…" her eyes focused quickly on the bottom of the stairs where Spike stood, holding out his hand to her. She could tell that he liked her dress. The drooling was a kind of giveaway.

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"Such a nice dress…" he purred in her ear. She sat down on his bed and he followed, never seeming to detach from her.

"Thanks…" she murmured back. This was it. Everyone always told her that when she met 'the one' she would know. She would just know. She never believed them. Not till now. Because he was the one. She knew he was and couldn't explain how. She just knew.

"Spike," she whispered. This was how it had to be forever. She just…all she wanted…"Spike…I want you to be my first…" She didn't know how she expected him to react. Surprise…happiness…anything really. But not this. He leapt backwards and pressed himself against the wall as if she was suddenly a dangerous killer.

"You…you mean, eh, you…you're…" he stuttered, completely discombobulated and lost. Buffy turned to stare at him.

"Yes…" she replied slowly. He closed his eyes and shook his head.

"No, no. I can't. I can't do this Buffy. You don't…a guy like me…no."

"But Spike," she rose, tears starting to fill her eyes. This was not what was supposed to happen, "I…I love you." His eyes opened slowly and he looked at her with an almost bemused expression on his face.

"Thank you," he smiled sadly. Then he walked forward and embraced her tightly, "Thank you, Buffy. But all the more reason to wait a while."

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He rose slowly out of the chair he had been sitting in. Smiling at Buffy, sleeping on the bed, he slipped towards the door and opened it gently. A sliver of light shone on Buffy's face. She wrinkled her nose, then opened her eyes, just in time to see Spike exit. Frowning, she rose and, silently, followed him.

The pair walked all through the house, up stairways and down corridors until he reached a heavy wooden door. Producing a key from his pocket, he opened it slowly. Buffy peered confused at him but had to stifle a horrified gasp. There was a woman standing behind the door. A darkly gorgeous woman, with long dark hair and large, strange eyes.

"My Willy has come to visit me…" she murmured, a smile slowly curving her lips, "come now. Give us a hug."

Buffy's mouth hung open in dismay as Spike…her Spike!…leaned forward and hugged this stranger.

"I wouldn't leave you alone on Christmas…" he replied, and he entered, the door closing with a thud behind him.

Buffy didn't really remember running through the halls by the time she got back to the room. But with every footstep she heard the vicious little voice in her head. He doesn't care. He's using me. He never loved me.

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"Morning sweet." Buffy opened her eyes slowly. They burned into his back when he turned. How dare he…pretending nothing was wrong. Nothing had changed. When it had all gone to hell.

"Have a good sleep?" he asked giving her a smile. But instead of melting her heart like it usually did, her heart hardened. That bastard.

"Not really. I tossed and turned. I had the most terrible dream. You left."

"Bloody stupid dream," he shot over his shoulder, opening the curtains, "that would never happen." It was too much. Buffy sat up, seething with anger and hate.

"Cut it out Spike! I know! I saw her and you and the whole thing!" Spike stopped and turned slowly to look at her. Buffy continued her tirade, even angrier seeing his face, "So I'm just the warm-up girl huh? Someone to keep you busy until you get a chance to go see your real girlfriend? Is she more fun than me? Does she kiss you more lovingly than I can? Is she…" Buffy looked down and when she looked back up the tears were leaking out, "Is she why you won't say you love me?"

"Buffy-" he started towards her but Buffy looked away quickly and sniffed, trying to wipe some of her tears away.

"So…do you love her?" she asked, trying to sound nonchalant. Like her heart wasn't smashed and getting even more broken with every word.

"I do. With all my heart and soul."

"How long?"

"My entire life. I bet you've felt the same way Buffy," she started to nod to try and clear her head, "About a young girl." She stopped and stared at him.

"What?" Spike sighed and smiled a very melancholy smile at her.

"She's my sister, Buffy."

"Oh." She could feel the heat and color rising in her wet cheeks. Now she knew the true meaning of 'humiliation'. Desperately she searched for something to say so he wouldn't notice, "Why haven't I met her? Or even heard of her?" He opened his mouth and closed it again, trying to find a way to say what he needed to say. He put a hand to his forehead and finally decided on the most direct way he could.

"Drusilla is crazy, Buffy."

"Crazy? What do you mean-"

"I mean crazy! As in stark raving mad? Nuts?" She shrank away from him and Spike sighed, "I'm sorry, Buffy. It…it's painful. She's my older sister. She was always my best friend, even if I claimed differently. When Mom died…Dru was there. The doctors say it was a combination of the stress and grief that pushed her over the edge. She was always a little…weird."

"Spike…I'm so…" Buffy blew her nose on her sleeve and rushed forward to hug him. _I can't believe this. I was so angry…and I had no reason to be. And I brought up a painful subject. God Spike, I'm so sorry_.

"'S alright. Don't cry, luv. I can't bear it when you cry," he fondly wiped tears away. Buffy smiled through her hiccups. _How could I have ever doubted him?_

"I really do love you," she offered. He had to know. He smiled.

"I know you do, pet. I'm sorry if you feel bad that I can't say the same back. Hey, hey," he took her face in his hands when her eyes started welling up again, "hear me out. I can't say that I love you because I've seen so many guys who say it just to say it. Then it doesn't mean anything. I can tell you truly mean it when you say 'I love you'. I just want you to be able to be sure of the same thing when I say it. If it's any consolation…I care about you very, very much. And I feel that someday…I will be able to tell you. Just not today. Alright?" Buffy could feel the sincerity in his words and see it in his eyes clear as day. She smiled and nodded.

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"It was great meeting you," Buffy gave Liam a light hug and beamed at him. He returned the smile and kissed her hand.

"We shall meet again fair lady…perhaps then you will-" he noticed Spike standing behind him looking distinctly not amused, "eh…see you soon Buffy." She laughed and went on to say her goodbyes to Darla and Fred. Liam sighed and turned back to his cousin, "She's a good catch, Will. Just don't forget she's still a kid."

"What?" Spike was jerked out of his Buffy-daze to stare at his cousin, "how…how do you know that Buffy-"

"Calm down, cuz. Don't forget, I spend half my life guessing how old girls are," pausing, he glanced at Darla and raised his voice slightly, "that is, I did until I met my fairest goddess, Darla…" She shook her head almost imperceptibly. Liam sighed and directed his attention back to Spike.

"Thanks," Spike said quietly. No matter how wild or lecherous Liam acted…he was a good person. And he wouldn't tell anyone how young Buffy was.

"See you next year," with a grin, Liam embraced his cousin. A car pulled up the drive. "Ride's here!" he hollered toward Darla and Angel. They both said their last goodbye to Buffy and the rest of the group and the trio piled in.

"Well, I suppose Fred and I should be on our way," Wesley offered. Spike turned and looked at him. He was Wesley. A stupid little prick.

"It was nice seeing you," Spike offered and took a deep breath. Wesley stared at him in shock for a few moments trying to puzzle out what had just happened. Then he grinned widely.

"It was very nice seeing you as well," he stuck out his hand and Spike shook it, rather less reluctantly than he had expected.

"Goodbye," Fred smiled and allowed Spike to give her a quick hug. _She really is a sweet girl_, Spike thought grumpily. Soon they were both gone and it was just Buffy and Spike standing outside in the cold.

"That was fun," Buffy spoke first.

"No it wasn't," Spike disagreed, "I found out Wes isn't as big a wanker as I thought and I actually liked his girlfriend. It was a bloody terrible holiday."

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This one is a bit longer because I got kind of bored writing about the Giles family and I wanted to get away from them. Oh well…R/R


	7. Chapter 7

Rebuilding Your Life in Ten Easy Steps

Part 8

A/N: I finally solved the Willow vs. William abbreviation problem. From now onward, William=Will and Willow=Wil (that's how they spell it in the subtitles)

Buffy took her seat in history class with a yawn. She really hated this class. It was always so old and dusty. Opening her binder, she was surprised to find a square of paper and a candy heart. Curiously she opened up the note.

'Go get 'em Slayer! Eternally, S'

She smiled and popped the candy into her mouth. Trust Spike to cheer her up even when he wasn't around. She still had to find a pet name for him though. He now constantly called her 'Slayer'…he told her that while practicing, he had said 'she really slays me' causing Lorne to dub her 'Buffy the Spike Slayer'. Shortened to 'Slayer'. It was cute.

"Is there something you'd like to share with the class, Buffy?" She looked up at the not amused teacher and smiled.

"My boyfriend is the best."

"I don't like it." Buffy grumbled, taking a sip of her soda and frowning at the stage. Gunn had persuaded to do a special 'double the music' night where Sunnyhell Players and Scorn combined to play together. Currently Spike and Tara were singing a love song and Buffy was not happy.

"What's not to like?" Willow asked.

"That. Sharing a microphone, all lovey-dovey. It's…it's unfair. Why should she get quality time with my boyfriend?"

"I don't think you need to worry Buffy," Willow smiled slightly.

"I'm not worried," Buffy snapped and drank some more soda with a sigh.

"Tara isn't going to steal your boyfriend, Buffy." Buffy pretended to not be interested for a few minutes before she gave in.

"But how do you know Wil?"

"Tara," Willow shrugged and blushed, "Not so much with the guys."

"What do you…oh. How do you know?"

"Well," her blush intensified, "She told me."

"Told you? When?"

"Well, you know how I haven't been so much in the dorm…"

"You little delinquent! You pulled the old 'I was at the library' trick on me!" Buffy was horrified, "And I believed it!"

"I did not!" Buffy raised her eyebrows doubtfully and Willow smiled guiltily, "I never said anything. You just assumed I was at the library. That's not my fault."

"I'm a bad influence on you," Buffy shook her head sadly. And Willow couldn't disagree.

Buffy threw her schoolbag onto a table and stretched. Homework, homework, how do I hate thee? Let me count the ways. _Liam was a bad influence on me_, she thought with a smile before turning to open her backpack. She was interrupted by a deafening whoop from the other room.

Spike charged in, face lit up with a huge grin.

"What's all the-ooh!" Buffy squealed as he picked her up and spun her around, showering her with kisses. When he finally set her down she was out of breath.

"Guess what, pet?"

"What?"

"Guess! Great news," he hinted.

"Umm…there are free sodas at McDonalds?"

"Better!"

"You won tickets to see Britney Spears?"

"WAY better!"

"Every Abercrombie & Fitch store in the nation is closing." He wrinkled his nose.

"Not quite that good."

"I give up, tell me!"

"We made it to Battle of the Bands!" He crowed, jumping in excitement again. Buffy cheered as well and hugged him tightly. She knew how much this had meant to the band. A chance to compete and really become visible to the public. There was only one flaw in this happy news.

"But Spike, it's been sold out for weeks! I'll never be able to get tickets!"

"No, you wouldn't," he shook his head, still grinning like a madman, "Unless you happened to be dating a band member."

"You got me tickets? Oh my god! I love you!" She kissed him again and the smile just kept on growing.

"Not just that. Tickets for you AND Wil. Gunn has one for Faith. And…Lorne said it was all right if I used his ticket so…tell Red to bring a friend! I'm sure Tara would love to go with her."

"Spike, you know that-" She got a good look at him and gasped, "You don't mean-no way!"

"It's pretty obvious, Slayer."

"To who?" She exclaimed, "I thought Wil was hung up over that Xander guy back home."

"Well she might have been, but no more. I know things, luv. I can see the truth about love sometimes when even the people in love can't."

"You know what, Spike? You're a pretty amazing guy."

"Well, yeah," he said, raising his eyebrows, "You just figured that out?"

With a scream of pretend rage, Buffy began to tickle him without mercy.

"I can't ask Tara to go to Battle of the Bands with me!"

"Why not?"

"Well, it would be forward and unfriendly and what if she says no?"

"She wouldn't say no, Wil! Who could ever resist you?"

"Last I checked, absolutely everybody."

"You have to have some backbone, girl! Just ask. There's no harm in asking."

"I suppose…"

Next chapter: The Battle of the Bands! Will Tara go with Willow? Is Spike right about their unspoken attraction? Find out! R/R please!


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